Mommy heart strings

So I feel like I am a fairly flexible person. Change never really intimidated me. I'm okay with most things and try to roll with the punches.

We have made two changes recently in our family and they somehow both seemed pretty significant and happened around the same time. My mommy heart is still working on adjusting.

First change: AJ and I have been making strides in communicating and attacking our finances and debt. Ever since we had kids and my full time income switched to part time, we have struggled. Not in the not enough money sense but more in the controlling our spending and then finding we don't have enough money.

So after we had our first child I switched from full time to 3 days a week. Well about nine months ago I felt the pull to cut back and I did back to 2 days. We had an amazing summer as a family and lots of outings with Jana and her kids. And then school started up again and we had some changes again with extra income and bills and we decided it would be best to add that third day back.

I love where I work. I love my boss and I love my schedule and knowing when I go home, I take nothing from work with me. And the kids are happy with their Nammie and don't miss me! Haha! So I can't complain but my mommy heart misses my kids on Tuesday so this change threw me for a little loop.

Second change: the preschool that Porter is in is a dual language program and fairly new. So last year he went 3 days a week and had an AMAZING teacher. I just couldn't fathom him being gone from home more than 3 days a week and decided to keep him with the same teacher we loved and be in the same class again.

Well, after a month and various things we decided to move him to the five day a week class. It is the right thing to do and when he goes to Kindergarten next year, he will be all day, so this is a good next step and transition.

So this morning, I go and take him, meet his new teacher, help him hang up his jacket and find a buddy to sit by and I got a lump in my throat and watery eyes and I am glad the teacher didn't ask me any questions!!

Porter was all smiles and happy to be with his friends from last year and his three other classmates moved over from his 3 day a week class with him, so it will be good. But my mommy heart strings were pulled and I walked out and went to work with lots of deep breaths.

Change. It's not always bad, but it still doesn't make it emotionally easy. I'll get there. Just need a little time.